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Vacation’s Over: Back to School

:: sigh :: No more carefree days filled with playing Halo 2 for Dash …

Well, summer’s over, and we’re all back to school, except for Nichelle.

All?

That’s right.

While Isaac and David are in school, Nichelle is taking time each day to work on letter recognition, shapes, and other skills with NaNi.

And, I’ve enrolled in a graduate certificate program in Software Engineering, offered by Boston University’s Metropolitan College, which should keep me busy enough to stay out of trouble. I’ll be taking two courses simultaneously for the next 14 weeks: Software Engineering, and Object-Oriented Object-Oriented Analysis and Design. In the spring I’ll grab another two. Best of all, the classes are taught on-site at Kronos, and the whole program falls under Kronos’ tuition reimbursement program.

In Software Engineering, I’m working on our class project with three co-workers I’ve worked closely with before: Stephan Arsenault, RaviShekar Gopalan, and Doug “JavaDoug” Ross. We’ve decided to build an online shared calendar program, tailored to families, and we’re building it in Ruby on Rails, probably with a MySQL backend. (I should get a BLOG up this weekend to chronicle that effort.) It’s going to be fun!

So far, Isaac and David are doing great at Tabernacle Christian School. Isaac’s attitude toward school and homework is much improved, and David is as eager and happy to be in school as ever.

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Moultonborough, 2006

What a blessing! At the end of July, we spent a week at the Varney/Tingley cabin in Moultonborough, New Hampshire. It was, quite possibly, our best-ever trip there.

We saw two different foxes, a huge heron, and a loon, all at or near the cabin. (My sister saw a bear last year, although we missed it, but we keep hoping and watching.)

(Above) This is the cabin we stay in. It’s not very large, but has running water (from the pond) and a bathroom with a shower and commode, which to me makes the difference between roughing it and really living. I used to vacation here when I was young, and loved it. (The same family still owns the property.) It brings back powerful memories of my childhood, especially time with my parents. So much of the property remains preserved just as I remember it, from the beautiful interior woodwork on the doors and door frames, to the electrical wiring my father did, right down to the way things smell.

When we got there this year, I noticed that the water pump was running nearly constantly. The pump draws water from the pond and pressurizes it in a small tank to provide running water for washing dishes, showers, etc. I checked it out, and you could hear the water rushing back down the pipe after the pump would reach proper pressure, and in a few seconds it would start up again. Thinking the check valve at the bottom of the water line was stuck open, I went out in the Berri Belle 2 (a rowboat), and followed the water line back into the pond, discovering that it had a 3- or 4-inch split in it, though which the water was pouring out. I tried to remove the split section that night, but couldn’t get the coupling apart. The next morning I got a new coupling at the local hardware store, and was able to cut out the damaged section and reattach everything—and I didn’t even need to re-prime the pump. Everything was working perfectly. I was so proud, and kept thinking of all the things my Dad used to fix. (He used to barter projects at the cabin for the price of renting it. In fact, he and my Mom installed the original water system many, many years ago.)

But, I should have kept Proverbs in mind. About 24 hours later, I checked the pump itself, and noticed it was dripping, something it definitely had not been doing the day before. I couldn’t find the source of the leak, so I kept it under observation. By that evening, the leak had become a small spray, and we called the Tingleys. We agreed I could try to patch it, but if it failed, we would have to use buckets for the water. I bought some epoxy-like substance that was used for waterproof applications, and was thrilled that the patch held. It dripped a bit, but that seemed acceptable. Unfortunately, the split in the pump casing was getting bigger, and my first patch blew off the next day. I patched it again, and we ran the pump only when we were actively using it, although I had to prime it several times. The second patch lasted until the day before we were going to leave, at which point I gave up and started carrying buckets. The cowling over the impeller had split at the point it was seamed in manufacture, and would have to be replaced. (I think due to the age of the pump, 25-35 years, they ended up replacing it.) After spending so much time listening for the pump’s operation, I kept “hearing” it running in my imagination for a week after we returned home!

(Above) This is the primary beaver dam that made Berry Pond. There are at least two beaver dams that created Berry Pond. When I explained to NaNi after one of our canoe trips that beavers made the pond, she replied, “Actually, God did.” Never argue theology with a 2-year-old.

One day we drove up to the Kangamangus (or Kancamagus—I’ve seen both spellings) Highway, which runs through the White Mountain National Forest, mostly parallel to the Swift River. To our delight and surprise, Eric and Kate Neville’s path happened to run across ours while we stopped to play in the river and have a picnic. Eric and I worked at MediVation over five years ago, and we’ve stayed in contact, but not seen each other since. What an amazing coincidence, especially considering how little time each of us spent in that particular location! Eric took this picture for us.

Nichelle did almost all the driving all week, including the trip there and back, even at night. She loves driving, and hadn’t been able to do it in a long time, so she was eager to see how much she could do. When I got home, it actually took me a while to get accustomed to driving my car again.

We love Clark’s Trading Post. (Above) Here Naomi and I attack Nichelle, who was standing on the side, from our bumper boat. Naomi hated having other people squirt her, although she very much enjoyed attacking them! Clark’s even has stand-alone motorized squirt guns set up along the sides of the bumper boat pool, so those not in the water can join in the fun.

I can’t quite believe Clark’s charges only $12 for admission. (Above) Isaac tried their climbing wall well over 15 times, something that most places would charge $5 a pop for. He didn’t make it to the top, but really loved it. I tried it too, but couldn’t steel myself to go any higher than Isaac. Next year …

Of course, one of the best things about the whole week was that Nichelle was feeling good for the first time since November, and was able to be active and participate in everything we did all week. What a thrill. It was not many weeks ago that Isaac broke down crying, when he realized (based on her condition for months) that Mom wouldn’t be able to do anything with us on our vacation. We praise God He has allowed Nichelle’s recent good health. It possible that the vitamin D deficiency causes her problems, but we won’t know until many months from now.

(Above) Clark’s has a costume photo studio, and Nichelle and NaNi love it. (The boys weren’t interested, as usual.) This was the first picture of Naomi that Nichelle picked out. Later on, she had me come back to the photo studio because she couldn’t decide if she should have gotten the more serious picture of Naomi. After some haggling, we bought that other one as well, and it has become our favorite.

The boys and NaNi love the paddleboat. (I thought it was great the years we used it as well.) We did almost flip it over once when David, Isaac, and I were all switching places and standing on the back.

(Above) This seaplane landed on the pond while we were there, which surprised me, because it was my understanding that the town prohibited that, which was why motorized craft aren’t allowed on the pond. It took off again as we were packing up to head back home.

We don’t watch television while we’re there, although I was tempted to turn on the TV and demonstrate to the kids what television in a mountainous area without cable is like. When we’re not outside, we read or play board games. Scrabble was very popular this year. Nichelle taught Isaac and David to play. One big difference, though, was that Nichelle, who normally destroys her opponents in Scrabble, lost five games in a row (four of them to me). After years of getting demolished by her, I finally seem to have “caught on” to the game, and was able to score some major victories by strategic word placement.

Inspired by the Seyranyan Family Circus, the kids did some acrobatics of their own in the days following our trip to Clark’s Trading Post. The Seyranyan family, from Moscow, is a must-see performance (they don’t perform on Fridays, so plan your trip accordingly). (Above) The kids invented this four-person pile-up one morning.

NaNi learned to row—sort of. I have a picture like this of me and my Dad, somewhere in a photo album my sister Joyce gave us.

We all spent a lot of time swimming, especially off of the raft that’s placed out in the deeper (about 12 feet) water. Naomi was no exception, swimming for hours at a time with her training ring, and occasionally using just a noodle (with very close supervision) or her lifejacket. She even jumped off the raft a few times.

(Above) David caught his first fish in three years. We discovered that live bait (worms) just can’t be beat for catching sunfish. (I don’t know much about fishing, and the kids have enjoyed learning as we go.) He caught this fish just after introducing himself to one of the families who lives on the pond. They were pulling fish out right and left, and invited him to have a try. I am always impressed with his social skills.

(Above) Naomi caught her first fish this year. She was absolutely thrilled. She caught 17 sunfish in about an hour and a half, all by herself. Isaac and I baited her hook and helped remove the fish. At one point, she turned to me and said, “I couldn’t have done this without you. Thank you, Daddy,” and gave me a big hug. She can be so sweet it melts my heart.

(Above) Isaac insisted this was a pike, but it appears to be a pickerel. (He’s not often wrong about biology or zooology—or in this case ichthyology.) It was Isaac’s big catch of the week. Right now it’s at home in our freezer, waiting for Nichelle to prepare it. We let the kids keep one fish each year to eat, although David’s sunfish were not eating-worthy, so he has accepted a single bite of Isaac’s fish when it is ready instead. I am also glad Nichelle is willing and able to gut, clean, and cook the fish, because I’m not sure I have the stomach for it. (If I ever travel in time, I will be sure to go forward, instead of into the past, because I have zero nontechnological skills.)

(Above) This part of the pond, opposite the beaver dam, we hadn’t explored before, although we’d been through many of the channels the beavers keep open to the east of there. The morning I found the dam I went out in the kayak, and got really close to the heron several times. (I wasn’t trying to bother him—he kept flying ahead of me and perching along the route I was taking. Sadly, I hadn’t brought my camera. Herons are huge, and surprisingly graceful in what appears to be a flight in slow-motion.

Berry Pond is absolutely lovely, especially on a clear day or at sunset. We also enjoy going out on the water at night, especially when the bats are out hunting. When it’s clear and one can normally see our own spiral arm of the “Milky Way.” (Personally, I think that’s a stupid name for our galaxy; if I ever travel to another galaxy, I’m going to tell them I’m from Andromeda.)

Several times a week NaNi announces, “I want to go back to the cabin!” as do Isaac and David. It’s a sentiment we all share.

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Adventures in Movement

For the past several weeks I had been longing to take Naomi—the boys, too—but especially Naomi, to the farm/petting zoo in Candia, N.H. Well, today, just three hours before they closed, we got everyone together and headed to Charmingfare Farm.

We had been there in the past for their hay rides and bonfires on a couple of church activities. This time we were able to explore the whole farm. That’s right, I said, “we”! I made it through, and saw all the animals, too, I walked the whole way. Of course I was a bit sluggish by the end, but it was worth it. We had a great time. We were also able to get tickets for a pony ride for each of the kids. They loved that. We have loads of pictures and video on all that took place. Watching the kids feed the animals was great as well, especially the goats.

On the way home, I suggested to Doug that we call the Sohmer family and see if we can visit. It’s so rare that we make it up to their area. So very glad we were able to drop in and say hello. I was thinking it was going to be a short visit, but we ended up hanging out until 9:30. How impressive is that! We got to meet their newest family member, Gabriella Danielle Li Ying Sohmer. What a sweetie. Doug took lots of pictures of her, too. She’s newly adopted, just two weeks or less now, from China. What a wonderful story they have to share. It was indeed a great blessing to be with the Sohmers again. Thank you guys for your hospitality, too. Love you.

Not so bad for me, it’s nearly 11 p.m. and I’m doing quite well, and for all of that the praise goes to God. What a blessing to be able to do more than just the “little things” again. For all that have been praying for us, thank you. 🙂

Sunday morning came and I was able to join the family and go to church even after a busy day on Saturday. Last week and also today, I decided to go to junior church with Doug and help teach. What a blessing! I haven’t been in class with the kids in many, many months. Hearing their sweet voices singing praises … how I’ve missed being with them, too. I had hoped to go on another shopping trip this afternoon, but the pain was back and said to me, “Yeah, right.”

To be with my church family, to hear preaching (in person), to give prayer requests and to take those that are shared, to give praise and to hear how God is working in the lives of other members, to be able to give and receive a hug and words of encouragement, to be a blessing and to receive one. To all of those things, I give thanks and praise to God for each opportunity that I am able to partake in a service.

[Note from Doug: While Nichelle was feeling better, I was worse than I’d been in years. More on that later … We’ll try to get pictures up tomorrow night.]

Another great day on Monday. Last night at about 10:30 I finally layed down to rest a bit and realized that I had gone the entire day, even with a much earlier start to my day and worked and cleaned without the need to nap. I’m of course thrilled. Keep the prayers coming. 🙂

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When You Sing, I See Monsters

Here are a couple of recent anecdotes involving singing:

Naomi does seem to have a good ear for music. It may be a little too good. The other night I was tucking her into bed, after our quick bedtime prayer time together, and asked her if she wanted me to sing with her. She responded, “No, Daddy, when you sing, I see monsters.”

A week or so ago after church on the church playground, Naomi and Isaac were on the swings, Isaac on one set and Naomi on another. They were both singing a beautiful praise song, and my heart was full of joy. Then, after a few minutes, Naomi decided she wanted to sing all by herself: “Isaac!” she screamed, “Let me sing by myself!” It wasn’t quite as praiseworthy.

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Books vs. The Book

Editor’s introduction: Beth’sMomToo is one of the most energetic “amateur” students of the Bible we’ve ever met (including knowing enough Greek to shame most pastors). She is also supremely knowledgeable about ancient Egypt, so much so that I would now refuse to attend the MFA without her. The Wilcox Family is honored to have her as a guest author on our BLOG.

I recently read a book sent to me concerning “Women’s Ministries.” Now … I find myself appalled by most books written on this subject. They are usually saturated with the world’s ideas and have very little to say about God’s ideas. But this one caught my attention in the first line, “The subject of this book is not women; it is the Church of the Lord Jesus.” Good start! While the book was heavily steeped in the particular denominational beliefs of the authors, overall I found it to be quite encouraging.

But when I leafed through the Appendix, what did I find, but the same old, same old. Buy our material, read our book list. An article entitled, “How to Evaluate Bible Study Materials.” How about studying the Bible instead of “materials” about the Bible? And this line killed me, “You are not to teach a lesson. You are to facilitate a discussion based on an assigned chapter of the book” (i.e., the material you buy from them).

We just finished our Ladies’ Study on Philippians. We didn’t skip ahead and spend all of our time on the application. We didn’t read a verse here and there out of context. We didn’t read what other people thought the book said. We read the Bible, in context, the book as a whole, repetitively. We did analytical charts; we did word studies; we found the themes in the book; we divided up each chapter into subject groups and titled them; we outlined the entire epistle and paid attention to how Paul developed his ideas. We looked up cultural practices, enlightening a few areas for us. We read companion passages in Acts concerning Paul’s establishment of the church at Philippi and his subsequent relationship with them. We studied the history of the city of Philippi and the Roman Empire as it applied to what we were studying. We found out more about the people and places mentioned within the Epistle. We looked at the ruins of the city as they appear today, learning a little archaeology on the side. (You know I had to fit that in somehow!) 😉

We studied the Word! Why are Christians so eager to “study” the Bible any possible way, except … to study …the … Bible?! And what was the result of all this effort? Amazing! Week after week I saw “light bulbs” pop on as they really began to understand what the text was saying and what the implications were! I saw women convicted by God’s Word. I saw women who were excited about studying God’s Word. (One of my favorite moments was when one of the ladies ran up to me one week after the Sunday morning sermon, her Bible open, and asked, “Is this a Granville-Sharp construction?” and wanted to discuss the implications!) She was getting more understanding out of what was being preached because of her own practice studying God’s Word … from God’s Word! That is exciting stuff, people!

I tell you … there’s just no other way to go! Why are so many Bible teachers so intent on keeping people away from their Bibles? Why do we want to focus so exclusively on the “doing” that we completely miss the power behind the “doing”? The Word changes your heart and mind as you immerse yourself in it, and then … the “doing” becomes the fruit that emerges!

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I got to go out on a Saturday and shop … amazing!!

This afternoon we left to drop Isaac off at his friend Cody’s house, which also gave Naomi and David the opportunity to use Cody’s trampoline (which Doug did tape for future viewing). Thank you, Langlois family.

I had an opportunity to chat with Cody’s Mom, too, which was great. Once we were done there, we went to Wal-Mart. Big deal for me, I actually managed to pick out clothes and shoes and try them on, while Doug took David and Naomi to buy the other items on the list. It was getting a “bit” unbearable by the time I hit the shoe aisle, but I was able to make it through the rest of the store, before the awful pain hit my back and legs. Naomi and I made it back to the van, extremely slowly, while Doug paid for the carriage full of items that we needed. I’ve needed several breaks since being home, but I’m still going, perhaps not as strong as earlier today, but still going, and that in itself is a huge blessing.

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So he reached for the wrong can … he’ll be fine!

One day this past week, David wanted to make a fried egg for lunch. Which is not a problem; both he and Isaac have been making them for some time now. After this particular time, I had come out to the kitchen and found the can of air freshner close to the stove. So, I calmly asked David what he had sprayed the pan with to make his egg. He was puzzled, and then when I had shown him the can, he realized he grabbed the wrong one. It was so cute. I asked him how he was doing and if his egg tasted funny, but he didn’t seem phased at all by the Cinnamon Sticks “flavor” he had with his meal.

Naomi has been adding extra drama to her tears by covering her eyes when she cries to over emphasize her grief. One of her great lines of late has been, “It’s OK,” or “Don’t worry, I can do it, I’ll be fine,” no matter what the situation may be.

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John Is Leaving

John turned 18 last Thursday. He celebrated this by launching a covert attempt to move out of the house. (Why it was covert is beyond me. He has every legal right to live where he wants; whether he was ready to do so, or whether this was in his best interests, is an entirely different question.) We did allow him to stay with his sister in Brockton for the past week, partly because we believed a break would do us all good.

Yesterday we phoned John at his sister’s house. We’ve talked to Felicia a number of times this week, but this is the first time we called to speak to John. We wanted to find out what sort of John would be returning today. We were hoping to see reflection and perhaps even repentance. Instead John told us he would be returning today to get the rest of his things. (This was one of the possibilities we were prepared for.)

When we asked where he was going, he wouldn’t tell us. He said he’d tell us eventually.

We told the kids. David cried for a long time. He is so loyal and so loving.

From last fall to late winter, John was all that we’d hoped he would become. His grades were quite good; he was clearly working hard in school, and had a part-time job in an accounting office. His attitude was excellent. He was helpful at home, and even managed to get along well with Isaac and David. For the first time in years, he behaved like one of the family, and it really felt that he was finally “home.” It was absolutely wonderful! I was so proud of him, and relished being able to brag about his achievements. We don’t know what precipitated the change, but all that disappeared, to our sorrow, by the early spring. Of late, especially the past few weeks, he has intentionally (as he admitted to our assistant pastor) been attempting to foment strife at home in the hope he could use that as an excuse to leave, not generating the level of discord he sought, but making life less-than-pleasant for all of us.

It appears John plans to live in Brockton, paying some rent, with someone he knows; perhaps a [biological] family member. He said “might have a job,” and that he intends to attend a vocational school in the fall.

I truly hope he succeeds.

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Mind-Body Connection: Rheumatologist at Brigham …

Or, how much pain can you work through on a daily basis?

How much would your body allow you to do with pain on the scale that’s typically 7 to 10? I’m frustrated, because I’d prefer to be active, being able to minister and do for my family like I once did…. and no one seems to “get” that.

—Nichelle

Yesterday we pulled off the usual logistics nightmare that involved a trip into Boston. Trish Dunn took the kids, except for John, who after a very disheartening and inexplicable episode, is spending a week in Brockton with his biological sister and her husband.

Dr. Anderson, a highly-recommended rheumatologist based at Brigham and Women’s Hospital in Boston (where Isaac was born), seemed to be highly skilled, and asked excellent interview questions. He is, unless we’ve missed some, the tenth doctor Nichelle has seen in the past two years.

Primarily, we forcused on the constant, very severe pain she is experiencing. He was able to rule out bone disease, tumors, diseases involving musculare weakness, nervous system disorders, and joint diseases such as osteoarthritis and synovitis. This left him with our old enemy diagnosis: Fibromyalgia. He explained that Nichelle had already tried most of the medications (and all of the types of medications) that normally help alleviate Fibromyalgia symptoms.

He suggested and later reiterated that he believed exercise would provide the most benefit. We twice explained very clearly that the recurrence of the debilitating symptoms occurred during a period of consistent and signficant daily exercise, and that the inability to do things like walk more than a few steps without intense pain makes exercise very difficult. He spoke of the “mind-body connection,” and how things like Yoga (although he does not “believe” in it per se) or meditation and other things that have to do with the mind-body connection can, in conjunction with exercise, be of benefit, indicating that one can change “how your body talks to you.”

He asked if she’d tried any of the various restrictive or eliminating diets, but we don’t know if he was thinking about the consideration of food allergies or sensitivities, or just throwing out possibilities. We discussed other alternative therapies: chiropracty (provided only very temporary relief), therapeutic massage (provided only very temporary relief), and accupuncture, which we are willing to try (there’s an opiate receptor model for how accupuncture actually works, which may make it ideal for treating pain), but we haven’t been able to find a practitioner covered by our insurance.

One of the more interesting things he asked Nichelle was, “If you were on the Western frontier 150 or more years ago, how would you handle this?” Later I thought of a really good answer: “She’d become a judge, and hang a whole lot of doctors.”

Overall, it was a long, discouraging day, especially due to the added concern about John.

This morning Nichelle seemed determined to fight through and determine just how much she could accomplish before completely succumbing to the pain. She even drove herself to the lab (5 minutes away) to get the latest bit of blood work done.

Nichelle made appointments today with the Pain Management Clinic at Southern New Hampshire Medical Center, and with who we hope will be a good primary care physician. Both are not until the end of July or first week of August.

Dr. Hall (who ties with Dr. Rescigno for “Best Doctors We’ve Ever Had”) called back with her latest test results: Nichelle’s vitamin D level was good, and her PTH (parathyroid hormone) level was good, which means that the hyperparathyroidism was indeed caused by the vitamin D deficiency. The importance of vitamin D was largely overlooked until fairly recently, we learned from Dr. Hall, and vitamin D deficiency has turned out to be very common, especially in the Northeast.

We’ll have some other test results, such as for hemoglobin disorders and blood cortisol levels, next week.

Later today Nichelle goes in to Mass. General for two bone density tests. The illustrious Debi Costine is providing transportation (we’re bribing her with Middle Eastern food), and Cindy Lavoix and company are coming over to our house to watch the kids (or play with our game systems; I’m not sure which), which means I get to go to work.